


Like They Do On the Discovery Channel

by Anonymous



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: M/M, What Have I Done, i have sinned, ive now written about the hunger with his dick getting vored i fucking hate this guys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-23
Updated: 2018-05-23
Packaged: 2019-05-10 10:42:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14735454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Merle and John have a discussion in Parlay, and it doesn't quite end how either of them expected it to.





	Like They Do On the Discovery Channel

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how my life has led to this moment but here we are. Started out as a joke and now I am posting this stupid thing. Enjoy it? Maybe? Idek anymore guys. 
> 
> If you want to skip the smut bit it goes from the end of the paragraph that starts "Merle's face felt even hotter" to the beginning of the paragraph that starts "After a few moments"

It started with Merle's reveal of what it was he had been calling him. The Hunger. It mused around in his collective hive mind, running across repeatedly behind the facade he held before the dwarf he was in parlay with. And he couldn't help but let out a laugh at the name.  
  
"The Hunger." He spoke aloud in an ever-ill-used voice, musing still as the words ran across his tongue.   
  
"Yeah." Came the response from the man who sat across from him.   
  
John smiled a little in response "I kind of like that."   
  
Merle seemed to give a knowing smile back, though it wasn't apparent to John just how much the man behind the smile knew.  "Yeah, I thought you might."   
  
It has been _so long_ since John had truly conversed with someone who frequented his company before Merle came along, and while his familiarity with body language and something so simple as a smile was unpracticed, he couldn't deny the hope that lingered within his... whatever his equivalence of a heart or soul would be. "Maybe a little inaccurate, unless it's a vore thing." He caught himself saying far too quick for his own liking, both embarrassed to have said it and still latching onto the hope that Merle would catch on.   
  
Even as Merle opened his mouth to speak, John interjected and changed the subject anyways, back to the task at hand. Fair is fair after all. "What-- is there something you want to know, Merle?" John asked, tone still holding a touch of mirth, his smile still in place.   
  
Merle watched John with a bit of a confused expression before he nodded and proceeded with his own inquiry. "Yeah, there is somethin' I'd like to know. Are you my friend?"

Merle watched from across the stalemate chess game, studying John's face as he noticed the smile disappear from it. With a knowing acknowledgement of his movement, Merle's heart rate began to quicken as John stood from his chair and began to approach him. Intently, his eyes followed John's movement, trained on his hand as it began to outstretch and catch ablaze with fire, Merle preparing to meet his fate again in the result of John killing him.   
  
However, John brought his hand back down and shook his head, seeming to catch his action and attempt to pull back into whatever semblance of understanding they were trying to come to terms with. "What am I doing?" He asked himself before turning to glance out the window for a moment, appearing to be lost in thought.   
  
What _was_ he doing? Sure he was trigger happy at times, "devour" first and ask questions later in most cases, but he couldn't have let his emotions control him in such a manner. He was practically friend-zoned by the only other being in such an immense amount of time, the only _interesting thing_ to have happened to him in _so long,_ and here he was about to throw that all away?   
  
"To have friendship, Merle, it requires you to..." John began to speak before letting out a sigh "love someone. And, be invested in your shared happiness. And these things, Merle, friendship and love and happiness, they’re- they’re all so… small. In the grand scheme of things, Merle," He let out a chuckle" they last a _second._ And I just don’t..." He came to a pause before he sighed once more, glancing back to Merle.

Sure all of these things may have been good in some light. But after so long of being on his own and being unable to _feel_ anything remotely close to this, he wrote it all off as unachievable. Out of his grasp despite desperately scoping out planar system after planar system for the only thing that truly made him _feel_ anymore. The light, existence itself. There was only lust for everything held within him, the primal drive to take, to consume for lack of a better term. Only want to sustain a need. Perhaps 'The Hunger' was a more fitting title than he had previously thought.   
  
John glanced back out the window once more before he carried on. "What brings you happiness Merle? I know that the game is over but what- what brings you joy, Merle? Please, I-- give me this freebie I-- just tell me." He asked, his voice becoming a little bit more desperate towards the end.   
  
Merle watched as John explained himself a little, eyebrows knitting together as John asked another question of him. It was more personal, not one that would give away the IPRE's information, and he knew he would just be killed again and be faced with the question next go around, so he answered. No harm in it. His voice spoke up as he replied "What brings me joy is… life. I think you can find joy anywhere, in life. I think it’s a conscious choice. I think you- you choose joy, in life. And no matter how bad things are, no matter how crummy, no matter how dark, no matter how many times some guy named John kills your ass--"   
  
John can't help but chuckle just a little at his inclusion into Merle's talk.

"You find joy. I’ve found joy. Honest to God gettin’ to know ya, I’ve found joy playin’ chess with ya," he laughs before continuing "I have enjoyed-- I haven’t enjoyed, you know, gettin’ my-- my ass killed, but I-- I find joy whatever I do. I don’t always do things right, and I don’t always do things smart. And I don’t always do a character voice. But whatever I do, I find joy in it. Because, at the end of the day, that’s all you got, is lookin’ back on the joy you had and the joy you found and the joy you gave other people."  
  
John held his attention out the window as he listened to Merle continue, feeling more longing in his being than that he has felt in so very long. He wanted to lie. He wanted to carry out his strength and murder Merle. He wanted to explain just how cruel this existence was that not even eternity, not even his endless chasing of the light and existence had been enough. He wanted to muse on things he felt so long ago. But he was tired.   
  
John, for once, was tired of the facade he had been using to mask his own feelings. And he wanted to give it up and never use it again. He wanted to follow Merle's words and he wanted to find joy. And he just might.   
  
In a moment, the chess game disappeared and instead, before Merle, laid a closed laptop. John finally turned to take a seat once more, this time sitting just beside the dwarf. "I think you may have a point... may I show you something?" He asked as he pulled the laptop between them both on the table and began to open it up, finding it did in fact work, and connect to whatever sort of Internet equivalence the Parlay room they've manifested had.

"Uh, sure." Merle said with a nod, not quite knowing the direction of this, but glad that he wasn't being killed. The curiosity was biting at him to ask just what John had to show him, but soon enough John pulled something up. It was some sort of documentary, regarding all of known space and time to one plane in particular he's already 'consumed', a plane that was far more advanced than any other he had come across in its investigation on such material. It brushed over everything as far as far off planes and realities to local flora and fauna, even small microorganisms that were devouring each other on a microscopic scale.  
  
A smile crossed John's features "One of my favorites." He spoke as he began to play it, glancing back to Merle and watching the curiosity play off the dwarf's face. "This, Merle, is where I have found joy. This, everything, is what I have been chasing and conquering for as long as I can feasibly remember. It has become a rut and I am forever searching for more, it's... it's pretty apparent by now I haven't found that yet. And in the process I have forgotten joy."   
  
John turns back to look at the documentary "Things like this... they sometimes remind me. It's all so beautiful, Merle, there's truly nothing more attractive. My existence is practically _painful_ , I have pondered eternity, I was the first person to ever successfully visualize it's... its _beauty._ " He spoke, almost sounding hypnotized by just what he was watching on the screen. Even after seeing the same recording, even after knowing the knowledge accumulated by having consumed this plane... it would never not leave this effect on him.   
  
And it wasn't until he noticed Merle watching him that he realized he was blushing, and that a familiar but not too familiar began to make itself known.

Merle watched as John explained his joy, his fascination with forever that was held within this simple documentary, and caught onto the fact this wasn't just some sort of fixation or some sort of fascination... this had to have been a kink. He finally spoke up and addressed John, breaking the tense silence over the sound of the documentary playing. "John, now... it is very beautiful I will admit. And it's very, uh, noticeable that this is your joy. But have you ever stopped to act out on that joy? Instead of penting up all that aggression... this may seem a little awkward but do you _know_ how to, uh..." Merle asked, trailing off as he felt his own embarrassment take place a bit. He has had his own strange experiences too, and this didn't necessarily strike him as _that_ weird. But this man, this _being_ before him has killed him, his friends, consumed entire realities and planes altogether and now he was about to give him the birds and the bees talk?   
  
"I... there may have been a time, once, but it has been so long ago, Merle, I... _That's it,_ isn't it." John asked but didn't wait for a response, flooded with realization as he still couldn't break his concentration from the documentary.   
  
Merle nodded as he still studied John's face, his own face growing red "Uh, yeah, I think that's it. And... listen, I don't judge. I have, well, a thing for plants, so it really isn't in my jurisdiction to judge." He said, trying to break up the tense atmosphere about them.   
  
John laughed and looked back to Merle now. "You really aren't put off by me literally having a thing for _having_ all of existence itself?" He asked quizzically, noting just how red the dwarfish man's face appeared.   
  
"Not at all! You do you and everything. I'm all good." Merle said as he gave him a smile.

John leaned in a little towards Merle and smiled back. "Thank you, for... being here to show me joy. To help me understand this... If it isn't too much to ask, can you help me? It's just-- it's been so very long, and I... huh, never really told you if you were my friend. Kind of danced around the question. I don't think friendship would be, well, _enough_ if you ask me."   
  
Merle's face felt even hotter for the question followed by John revealing just how he felt about it, but he still nodded nonetheless "Hey, I'd rather be making love than war any day." He spoke, a slight timidness to his voice, but he still went ahead to help John out.   
  
Merle's hands went up to begin unbuttoning John's dress shirt and removing his tie, sliding his hands then across his shoulders and pushing the shirt back and off his form. He then leaned John back against the chair he was sat in and went to climb overtop of him, straddling his lap facing him. Merle's hand went back to his shoulders and held to them as he began to grind himself down, his own half erection rubbing against the one that was blatantly obvious held by John. The clothing of their pants between them caused more friction and as Merle continuously ground down against John, it wasn't long before both were left panting.

John's hand shot up to hold onto Merle's hip, while the other clung to the chair as the dwarf rode down on him. And then, it was paused and John quickly looked to see why Merle had stopped.   
  
Merle got up from where he was sitting and instead went to start undoing John's pants and his own, soon relieving both of their erections from their confines. Then he moved closer to John, carefully taking hold of his member with one hand and beginning to pump it up and down, watching as the man started to go back to the state he was previously in. He marveled at the sight of this powerful being who had _killed him several times_ now devolving into a panting mess by _his hand,_ taking more pride in his work and throwing his previous embarrassment to the wind.   
  
He shifted his head down and began to take John's dick into his mouth, hand still pumping the rest of his length he could not fit. Merle's head then began to bob in time with his own pumping, feeling one of John's hand hold fast to the back of his head and try to force him to take more. After a moment, though, John realized what he was doing and stopped, simply allowing Merle to do the work.   
  
Merle's bobbing increased in time with his stroking up and down John's cock, and Merle finally took his other hand to his own to begin jerking himself off. He concentrated as best he could to keep the pace up with both hands and his mouth, finally feeling both of them come closer and closer to the end before finally John's hand gently tugged Merle's hair and he let out a cry, releasing into the dwarf's mouth. Merle rode his own orgasm out, coming shortly after and releasing into his own hand while he made work swallowing all that John released.   
  
After a few moments of both parlay members riding the high of their orgasms, they finally came to with realization of what they've done and what they've felt. And from there, they've made an understanding and an agreement to make use of parlay more frequently.

John still wasn't necessarily satisfied, he most likely will never be. But at least Merle didn't die through parlay this time.


End file.
